December 2, 1998

i am here. i cry for no reason. i scream and laugh and die all seconds within seconds. people stare. he asks me what the problem is. how frivolous are my tears? silly girl. crazy girl. hi. i can hear you talking. it isn't fair that you don't wait for me to go. i'm hiding, running, laughing and i think i'm learning to hate you finally. why the silence? say something. start SCREAMING just like me. you're just as fucked up as i am you just don't flaunt it as well. last night i cried until my eyes burned. i wanted to eat all these pills but she said she'd kill me if i did. err. hi. thanks. yes. i feel better now. see me smile? good. it's because of you and what we said. no no...not you. YOU. yes, yes, yes. hi.

bye.